Category: Movies and TV

Childhood Memories, Movies and TV

Henry Winkler – Still Cool

I was reading Parade magazine a few Sundays ago and came across an interesting article about a new book Henry Winkler had written called “I’ve Never Met an Idiot on the River: Reflections on Family, Fishing, and Photography”. Henry Winkler. Now there was a name I haven’t heard in a long time.

As I read about his new book and passion for fly fishing in Montana it suddenly occurred to me that this man had a profound impact on me growing up. But Henry Winkler is no ordinary man. He was; well let me rephrase that, IS the coolest person I ever knew while growing up.

I’m sure by now he is tired of hearing about it but to me and to thousands of others Henry Winkler will forever be remembered as Arthur Fonzarelli aka The Fonz. Quite possibly the greatest character to ever appear on a fictional television sitcom (and also another reason how influential television can be and why we as parents need to always be conscious of what our children are watching).

Some where in the 1970’s is where my story begins. A time when “Happy Days” was the reason for my existence. I couldn’t really tell you all of the story lines or dialogue and quite frankly, it doesn’t really matter. All I knew was that Fonzie was my hero.

From the moment I saw that 45″ record spinning and the ”Sunday, Monday… Happy Days”  theme begin playing I was hooked. And when they showed the Fonz giving me the thumbs-up as he appeared in the middle of that record I knew all was right in the world. Because whenever Richie, Ralph and Potsie got into trouble, The Fonz was always there to help bail them out.

No matter how tough their assailants may have been when The Fonz showed up they all turned to mush. The bigger they were the harder they’d fall. My personal favorite episode was the one where the dude with the iron claw hand came at him. The Fonz just grabbed him by that metal hand and bent it straight back, fingers and all. I don’t even think Superman could have done that. Just the presence of The Fonz was powerful enough to instill fear into even the meanest of people, my own family included.

As most young siblings do, my brother Bones and I used to fight like cats and dogs. Bones was one tough cookie back then. In fact, Bones was even considered one of the most feared kids in the entire neighborhood.

Now I know what you’re thinking: “Who could possibly be afraid of someone named Bones”? Trust me, we all were. Most of the time me and the other kids on our block would be afraid to even approach him out of fear of what he might do to us.

Any attempt to invade his space on a bad day might result in a head lock, noogie session, punch in the arm or some combination of the three. Yeah, I knew my bro was a bad ass but the only thing that really got to him was The Fonz. Because when Happy Days was on his eyes didn’t move from the TV. He was in awe just like I was. Oh I’m sure he would like you to believe that he was on the same level of cool as The Fonz but I knew the truth. Yes sir, Bones was scared of The Fonz and really, who could blame him?

Fonzie had these awe-inspiring powers. He could just snap his fingers and all the girls would be drawn to him like a moth to a flame. In retrospect, I sure wish I had that ability in high school. I might have gotten out more.

And then there were the times that The Fonz would be in the bathroom preparing to comb his hair and then realize, every time of course, that there would be no need. It was always perfect.

And I can’t even count the number of times I hurt my hand trying to pound the jukebox and get it to start playing a tune like he did. C’mon, now tell me that’s not cool! And only The Fonz had that ability.

But of all the powers The Fonz possessed there was only one that I still desire. I mean, who wouldn’t want to walk into a room and hear nothing but hand clapping, whistles, cheers and girls screaming while welcoming your arrival? I’m still not sure how he pulled it off but on every episode, when he walked on set that’s exactly what happened. Coolness sure has it’s advantages.

The Fonz was not only cool but he also had the ability to ward off evil. Growing up, I used to have to sleep in the scary attic of my grandparent’s house. A real turn of the century type house with creaky steps. More than enough to scare the crap out of a young boy. But I was not afraid.

Me in the 70's in a feeble attempt to imitate the master

For as I ascended the stairs each night to climb into bed a huge poster of The Fonz greeted me. Dressed in his trademark leather jacket, wearing a smile and giving me a big thumbs up. HEY!

It was all I needed to protect me from any monsters that might be lurking under my bed. As far as I was concerned,  if Bones was afraid of him there was no way the Boogie Man would mess with The Fonz either.

Fonzie and the gang ended their run in 1984 just as I was starting high school. It was bittersweet to say goodbye but I knew that it was time for me to take care of myself and find my own cool. Something I think we all have to do on our own.

 

But if there’s one thing The Fonz has taught me it’s that there are actually many different ways to be cool.

Living our lives to the best of our ability and raising our children right tops my cool to-do list. I’m sure Fonzie would agree and give me a thumbs up for the way I turned out.

After reading the Parade magazine article I decided right then and there that I’m going to buy Mr. Winkler’s latest book and get a glimpse into his human side as well. I know it will be a good read. I’m looking forward to the adventures he has with his family.

And even better, I really can’t wait to tell Bones how cool it was to go fly fishing with The Fonz.

Childhood Memories, Movies and TV

Ultraman

Here’s a story worth re-telling. Last year while paying a visit to a local Best Buy I took notice of a “Bargain Bin” of DVDs they had set up in the middle of the store. The bin contained piles of DVDs they were trying to unload and every DVD in the bin was $5 each.

I curiously perused the piles of Paul Blart: Mall Cop and Vin Diesel throw aways not really knowing what I was looking for. Anything but the aforementioned ones might have peaked my interest.

As I reached the bottom of the pile my eye caught something that took me back to my childhood. It was if a huge vacuum had just sucked all the sound out of the area I was standing in. My heart began to race and I swore a tear started to run down my cheek.

No way. It couldn’t possibly be… but it was…the HOLY GRAIL.

The Complete Collection of Ultraman on DVD. The swirling clay introduction, the orange suits and motorcycle helmets, the 1966 Corvairs they used to drive and of course, Ultraman himself.

I think we as a society have grown soft when it comes to our super heroes. Oh sure, we still want the hero in the tights to rescue the beautiful girl and save mankind from the forces of evil. But the truth is, we’ve become accustomed to watching CGI animated superheroes saving the world from these baddies. Like Tobey Mcguire as Spiderman hanging from a rope with a green screen behind him that will later become the city of New York.

What ever happened to the good ol’ days of watching some dude in a rubber suit kick another dude in a rubber suit’s ass in a miniature city all within thirty minutes? The kind of show that gets the adrenaline of seven-year old boys raging in the 1970’s?

Sadly, those days are gone.

Here’s the premise of the show taken from Wikipedia:

The storyline begins in the near future. Sinister aliens and giant monsters constantly threaten civilization during this period. The only Earth organization equipped to handle these disasters is the Science Patrol, a special worldwide police force equipped with high-tech weapons and vehicles, as well as extensive scientific and engineering facilities.

Led by Captain Mura, the Science Patrol consists of Arashi, Ito, Fuji (the only female member) and Hayata. The patrol is always ready to protect the Earth from rampaging monsters, but sometimes (ahem, MOST of the time) it finds itself outclassed.

When the situation becomes desperate, Hayata, the Patrol’s most capable member, holds the key to salvation in the form of the “beta capsule,” which, when activated, allows him to transform secretly into the super-humanoid-powered giant from space, who becomes known to the people of Earth as Ultraman.

While active as Ultraman, Hayata’s human body goes into a type of deep coma, reviving only after the threat has been neutralized and Ultraman willingly departs.

Victory is never assured, however, as Ultraman’s powers (his very life force) rapidly depletes in Earth’s atmosphere.

At the beginning of each transformation from Hayata-to-Ultraman, the warning light on the giant’s chest begins as just a steady blue color. But as Ultraman exerts himself, the color timer changes to red, then blinks-—slowly at first, then with increasing rapidity—-as his energy reserves get closer to exhaustion.

As the voice-over narrator reminds the viewer, beginning first with episode 2 and for each episode thereafter, if Ultraman ever reaches the point of total energy depletion, he “will never rise again.” How terrible!

So the formula is simple: Every episode a giant monster (aka dude in rubber suit) attacks. The Science Patrol goes into action and tries to defeat it. Of course, they can not. Just as all hell is about to break loose, Hayata raises the beta capsule into the sky, activates it, and becomes Ultraman (aka dude in rubber suit). Ultraman does battle with the giant monster and just before his time on Earth is about to expire he vanquishes the creature using one form of his cosmic powers and then flies off.

I don’t mean to brag about the show but for a seven-year old boy named Jimmy Wood, this was ‘da BOMB!!! I remember the best part was the anticipation for Ultraman to show up and open a can of whoop ass. Whenever Hayata would raise the Beta Capsule and the voice said: “Using the Beta Capsule, Hayata becomes Ultraman!” the whole house could have burned down but I wasn’t moving from the TV.

Ok, stop laughing. Ultraman was the cornerstone of my life as a kid. I remember literally RUNNING home from school to catch his exploits. It didn’t even matter if I missed the beginning of the show either. The story line didn’t concern me. As long as I was there when the Beta Capsule was activated and the can of whoop-ass opened I was a happy boy. Believe me, even now there are days where I could REALLY use that Beta Capsule.

But kids today don’t seem to get it. I tried watching it with my own daughter but I think her interest in it is simply to laugh at me and call me a dork. That’s ok because it’s true. I am a dork.

A dozen years ago Hiroko Sakurai, the woman who played Fuji on the show, actually came all the way from Japan for a Sci-Fi convention in New Jersey. She couldn’t speak a word of English but I stood in a long line to get her autograph and my picture taken with her. It was exciting to do as an adult so I imagine I would’ve been standing in a puddle of my own pee if I went as a seven-year old.

I know, I know. It’s not a show for everyone. “To each his own” and all that crap. But consider this as another reason to own the collection:

Like Kung-Fu movies watched late at night, Ultraman can work better than any sleep aid you’ve ever tried. It’s all natural, more powerful than Ambien and Lunesta combined and has ZERO harmful side effects.

So the next time you can’t sleep, pop in a DVD and enjoy. I recommend Episode 15. It puts me out within ten minutes. You might sleep for days….Trust me, if you’re not a fan and can make it through the first two episodes without falling asleep you should seek professional help for insomnia and sleep apnea immediately.

Because if nothing else, watching Japanese dudes wrestle in rubber suits and airplanes where you can see the strings controlling them on camera induces sleep faster than tryptophan from the main course on Turkey Day.

But Ultraman is STILL cool. It was the best $5 I ever spent.

1980's, Childhood Memories, Movies and TV

Spider Man 4

This is the final full length installment of the Spiderman Home Movies. I know what you’re thinking: you’re sad to see them go and I can understand your pain. After all, these movies were a labor of love for two amateur film makers back in 1985. But alas, all good things must eventually come to an end.

This final short features our hero Spidey (played by my friend Mike) as he does battle against an evil bank robber (played by none other than yours truly, the author of this blog).

It also features a rather ominous omen in one of the final scenes which regular readers of this blog will immediately pick up on. For others, I’ll explain after you watch it.

Basically the plot is simple: A crook in a ski mask has just robbed a bank and is attempting a get-away when Spidey shows up.

And now, for the final time I present to you: Spiderman…

Some neat and interesting tidbits:

1. This short features a cameo by my Siberian Husky “Sheba” who passed away in 1986.

2. You see the shell of what would become my Dad’s 1965 Ford Mustang on the right side of the hill.

3. The 1977 Malibu Classic car is the one I most remember being driven around in when my parents would take me to see the Trains.

Unfortunately though, watching this short again also brought back one eerie memory for me:

The scene where Mike (as Spidey) attempts to stop the Crook from escaping in the Vega by holding the car back. Spidey winds up getting run over in the movie. In the movie this was fiction but it almost became reality for me shortly after filming.

If you haven’t read that story – here it is.

Was this an omen to what was going to happen? I’m not sure. But by watching it now you can get a visual representation of what it was like for me on that fateful day.

All courtesy of your friendly neighborhood Spiderman!

1980's, Childhood Memories, Movies and TV

Making Movies: Spiderman 3 – The Black Costume

Back in May of 1984 Marvel Comics released issue #252 of The Amazing Spiderman. As an avid Spidey fan it was no coincidence that Amazing Spiderman was the first comic book I ever subscribed to. But what was ironic was that this particular issue just happened to be the very first one I received in the mail.

You see, this was also the first issue where Marvel surprised readers by giving Spiderman a brand new costume. Something I did not particularly care for. You can check that story out here (A fun read).

The change away from the classic red and blue tights Spidey wore to a plain black design posed a dilemma for two young film makers (my friend Mike and me). If Spidey was going to change costumes then we also had to change as well in order to keep our films relevant.

A call went out to the hard-working people in our design department (Me and Mike). Under a tough deadline and with no money for anything but film and developing it was going to be a real challenge. It was a challenge we gladly accepted. After all, if there was a “new” Spiderman in town then it was our duty to showcase him.

In the end, it all worked out.

Spidey vs The Mime Part 3 introduces the new black costume. It was the only film we made that doesn’t have the wall crawler in his classic red and blue jammies (or in our case, the jeans or red shorts with tube socks).

Our story opens with the Mime returning to town to wreak havoc (what exactly that “havoc” is isn’t revealed). Meanwhile a short ways away our friend Peter Parker is busily sewing his new black costume. Suddenly his Spider-Sense starts tingling. He realizes that once again, The Mime is near so he gets the chance to try on his new duds.

Appearing as Spidey he jumps on to the nearest roof and spots his adversary. Let the fun begin.

Watch the video and see if you can spot the classic 1980’s reference and the flub. They should be quite obvious:

For Spidey’s costume what could possibly be better than a 1980’s black Members Only jacket? It perfectly matched the maroon-colored one I wore as the Mime.

As far as the flub is concerned: did you notice the shadow when Mime was rolling down the hill after being punched over the fence? Yup, that’s Mike filming.

I remember when we first got this one back from the developers and loaded it on the projector up in my bedroom. We must have watched it two dozen times. It was so good.

Now a days, kids can make films a thousand times better with the equipment that’s available. Had this technology and the Internet been around in 1985 I think Mike and I would have accepted at least a pair of Academy Awards by now.

Sure, you see the clothes hanging out on the line. And some shots are out of frame. And sure, Mike’s shadow is visible. But as far as the black costume is concerned, I think we hit a home run.

What do you think?

1980's, Childhood Memories, Movies and TV

Making Movies: The Return of Spidey

Friday…FRIDAY…FRIDAY!!!! Did I mention that today is Friday? And what could possibly be better than Friday? Just one thing – a Friday with your friendly neighborhood Spider man. Or in this case, another home movie from 1985 with me and my friend Mike bringing the wall crawler to the silver screen.

I have to tell you, these movies were so much fun to make. Way better than playing Dungeons and Dragons or taking a walk downtown to the comic book store.

I think the cost to film just one of these shorts and have it developed was somewhere in the range of $20. Roughly equivalent to a billion dollars as far as a kid from 1985 is concerned. So for us to forego seeing a rock concert or buy a video game and instead try to make a movie was a huge investment and something that we did not take lightly.

Once again, let me set the scene for you:

In our last episode Mime (the bad guy in this story played by yours truly) narrowly escaped the clutches of Spidey (played by my friend Mike). Mime is now sitting on some steps next to a hill contemplating his next move when suddenly he hears someone approaching. He looks and sees that it’s Peter Parker, a young punk kid from school.

At this point Mime (who does not know the kid is actually Spidey) decides to have a little fun. He hides behind a fence and trips Peter as he walks by.

The “clumsy” child falls and then rolls down to the bottom of the hill. Distraught about his predicament and knowing that the evil Mime has just attacked him, Peter starts crying and immediately runs behind the fence to become Spidey. (Hey, no one said our Spidey didn’t get emotional).

That’s when the fun really begins.

This film would be the first to introduce the special effect of teleportation. It was a technique that we would also use in subsequent Spidey shorts as well and was rather simple to produce. Here’s how it worked:

In my role as the Mime I would touch my fingers to my temples to indicate I was about to do some amazing mind trick. Mike would then stop filming and stand perfectly still. Once I was out the scene Mike would begin filming again and PRESTO! I had “magically” disappeared. We did the reverse of this effect to make me reappear somewhere else. Pretty cool huh?

In addition to teleporting, this short also features a comedic showdown on the stairs and a daring escape by the heinous villain.

One word of caution: much of this footage is out of focus so do not adjust your settings. This error was actually the case when we originally got the film back from the developers. But the story idea is still there.

Enjoy!

Some notable 1980’s references:

1. You’ve just got to love Spidey’s summertime costume. A red shirt/shorts combination with red mittens for gloves. Believe it or not, Mike’s “Coke is It” red t-shirt was all the rage back then. This was the logo used most by Coca-Cola back in the mid 1980’s.

2. The classic tube socks worn up to our knee caps.

3. The laundry hanging out on the clothes line. It may seem trivial these days but back then washer and dryer combos were quite expensive. Most families only had just the washer and would hang clothes out on the line to dry in the summer or take the wet clothes to the laundromat to dry in winter.

As was always the case when filming, the challenge in making these shorts was that everything had to be done in one take. Any kind of screw up couldn’t be erased. This episode shows two examples of mistakes. One of which we were able to “fix”.

The first mistake you’ll notice is one scene where Mike was filming and you see part of his mitten filling the shot. Obviously, there was nothing we could have done about that. But the next flub we knew about immediately and were able to quickly bounce back from.

Originally, Spidey was supposed to capture the Mime on his first attempt at spinning the web. I was the cameraman at the time and was pulling on the “web” as Spidey shot it but accidentally let go of it and it bounced back onto Mike’s arm.

We spent the next ten minutes trying to figure out what we were going to until at last it dawned on us. We both looked at each other, smiled and said: “Spidey’s Web Shooter Jammed!”. It was the perfect opportunity to film it again and this time get it right.

Having rediscovered and sharing these movies has been a great experience. I’m even considering sending in my resume to George Lucas. I think I’m a shoe-in for a position in the special effects department. What do ya think?

Have a great weekend!

Movies and TV, Things I Think

Five Things I Think: The Best Movies of All Time

Perhaps you’ve read my past rants regarding holiday specials, the best scary movies I’ve seen or the warnings I’ve given about the films you need to avoid. As we wind down 2011 it seems only fitting that I’ve saved the best for last. So I’ll use this post to inform you of what I believe are the greatest movies of all time.

Let’s be honest right up front: I’m no movie mogul. I have no degree in movie watching and for the most part I can sit through pretty much anything. I like the thriller, comedy and action movie all equal. In other words, I’m not a hard person to entertain (I mean, I watch Godzilla for goodness sakes).

My judgement on these movies has nothing to do with box office success either. Truth be told I didn’t care much for Avatar (way too long) and Titanic and Transformers didn’t make my list either ( no offense Mr. Cameron or Mr. Bey). The criteria I use to determine if a movie is great or not is simple, much like me:

#1 – The film must have a fantastic story line. (as most great films tend to do)

#2 – The movie must not drag on and on. There are plenty of movies that are worthy of being called great but they seem to drag on longer than they should (Avatar and Batman: The Dark Knight both quickly come to mind). I prefer movies that tell the story quickly and makes you want to watch it again.

#3 – I’ll give bonus points to a movie that meets the first two criteria and also has a twist or is unique for the year it came out. For example, according to the American Film Institute’s list of the 100 greatest movies of all time the #1 film by far is Citizen Kane and I would tend to agree with that statement. For a film that came out in 1941 there’s no doubt it meets all of my criteria to a tee. Everything about it deserves top honors. But since neither I nor my parents were around in 1941 to witness this masterpiece first hand I’ve instead created my own list with some information from Wikipedia included.

So dim the lights, grab some popcorn and let’s go:

5. The Sixth Sense (1999): This film made my list because I, like most others, fell for the twist at the end. I love movies that get you thinking one way and then pull the rug out from under you at the end.  Hollywood tried to copy the twist from this movie many times since but always came up short.

This film also gave director M. Night Shyamalan a green light to make a half-dozen bombs following it’s release. (See, well on second thought DON’T see, The Happening, a film which made my WORST list).

 
4. Raiders of The Lost Ark (1981): Harrison Ford at his finest. This film is an adventure of biblical proportion. It pits Indiana Jones (Ford) against a group of Nazis who search for the Ark of the Covenant because Adolf Hitler believes it will make their army invincible. Contains non-stop action, a love story and even the Nazi’s getting an ass-whooping. What more could you ask for?

 

 

3. Forrest Gump (1994): Tom Hanks was a freaking genius. One of the first actors to for go his salary in exchange for a take of the box office. The story depicts several decades in the life of Forrest Gump, a native of Alabama who experiences firsthand, and contributes to, some of the defining events of the latter half of the 20th century while being largely unaware of their significance due to his below-average intelligence. Run Forrest, RUN!

 

2. Star Wars (1977): Episode 4 for those keeping score, this film clocks in at 90 minutes and is the movie that started the whole Star Wars craze. I’ll even give props to Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi as far as coolness goes but nothing beats the original.


and by now you should already know….

1. JAWS (1975):  Without a doubt the greatest movie ever made. The only film that if I can (and have) watched every day and it never gets old. I used to be able to quote this entire movie line for line, much to the chagrin of my parents and siblings. “You all know me, know how I earn a living…”

JAWS won three Academy Awards and should have won the Best Picture but lost out to One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest when the academy had a Jack Nicolson bias. Don’t get me wrong, Cuckoo was a good film but certainly not better than JAWS.

Honorable Mentions: These are films I highly recommend you see. Right now if possible. You have my permission to take the rest of the day off.

In no particular order:

Platoon (1986), The Usual Suspects (1995), The Green Mile (1999), Memento (2000), The Lord of the Rings Series, Groundhog Day (1993), Can’t Buy Me Love (1987), Fight Club (1999), A Christmas Story (1983).

Your turn. What are some of your favorite movies of all time?

Childhood Memories, Movies and TV, Thought and Opinion

Rest in Peace Colonel Potter

Harry Morgan, the beloved actor best known for his role as Colonel Sherman T. Potter in the television series M*A*S*H died Wednesday morning December 7th. Irrelevant but no less ironic is the notion that the man best known for portraying a leader of a mobile army surgical hospital during wartime passed away on the 70th anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor.

Although Mr. Morgan lived a long life of ninety-six years news of his demise still hit me like a punch in the stomach. I wasn’t around for his early film roles and was much too young during his Dragnet days but M*A*S*H was always a staple in my home when I was growing up.

There wasn’t a week that would go by, most often on Monday nights, where my father would gather the family together around our state of the art 19″ television to watch the latest antics of the four-oh-double-seven. Most kids of the day would have much preferred to watch Little House On The Prairie but not us. We were regular army.

Sherman T. Potter reported for duty shortly after the demise of Lt Colonel Henry Blake and quickly became one of my favorite characters. I cried my eyes out the first time I saw the episode where Colonel Blake died in a plane crash on what was supposed to be his discharge from the army and journey stateside. It was that same punch-in-the-stomach feeling and I remember thinking even at that young age how hard it would be to replace a character like that. But a few episodes later along came Colonel Potter and the rest is television history.

The thing I liked most about Colonel Potter was that he didn’t take any crap. Countless times Corporal Klinger (the transvestite who wanted to get a section eight discharge) would come up with a new scheme to get out of the army and every time he was turned away by Sherm. My particular favorite being the time Klinger attempted to eat a Jeep and wound up in the infirmary. When told that Klinger was in the process of eating a Jeep the Colonel calmly responded “This too shall pass.”

M*A*S*H is one of those shows that never gets old. You can watch every episode from first to last (the finale which aired in 1983 still reigns as the most watched television episode ever) and they all still look new and relevant. The environment of a makeshift tent, the green combat fatigues, the hospital. Everything immortal. Which is something I also thought would hold true for Colonel Potter as well.

It’s funny, I have several seasons of M*A*S*H on DVD and rarely watch them. But whenever I happen upon a M*A*S*H marathon on TV Land I am hooked. Maybe it’s just a final memory of youth but for me the show ranks right up there with only The Three Stooges: one that gives a better viewing experience when stumbled upon while channel surfing.

So Godspeed to you dear Colonel Potter. You have served both your country, and my childhood well.

Movies and TV, Thought and Opinion

What We Should Learn From The Netflix Debacle

I don’t know about you, but I’m a lazy ass. When I want something, I want it NOW. I don’t want to toast my bread anymore or have to brush my teeth manually. I’m all about convenience. I’d much prefer to go into the kitchen every morning and push a button from a menu board and it would magically appear. And I’d rather just stand there and open my mouth while an electronic machine got my whites all pearly.

I mean, c’mon this is the twenty-first century here right? Even George Jetson assumed we’d all be driving cars that could fly and using robots as maids by now. Is it too hard to ask for a little convenience?

But my biggest beef isn’t really about toast or teeth. It’s about something much more important. MOVIES.

When I read about the whole Netflix debacle I was stunned. I mean, here was a tiny upstart company who literally put the goliath stores Blockbuster and Hollywood Video out of business with just this simple idea:

Maybe people don’t want to drive to get their movies. What if we mailed DVDs to their house and they could send it back whenever they want? And what if we used the power of the Internet to stream movies into their homes when ever they wanted?

The idea was brilliant and Jetson like. I don’t know about you but I certainly don’t sit at work all day long and decide I’m going to watch a movie that night. Unless it involves going to the theater for a new release watching a movie is a spur of the moment thing. Something you decide to do while perusing the channels.

And quite frankly, when I want to watch a movie the LAST thing I want to do is have to order a DVD online and then trudge out to the local grocery store and wait in a line at the Red Box machine to pick it up. And please don’t get me started on the old biddies that hold up the line by standing at the machine and just browsing. The Netflix model was right up my alley.

But then corporate greed took over and they blew it. NetFlix decided a few months ago to nearly double their monthly fees and split the company into two parts. One for DVD’s by mail and the other for their streaming service they would rename Qwikster. And that’s when everyone ran for the hills.

After much public outcry and seeing their stock price plummet, NetFlix “Qwiksterly” eight-sixed the idea of separate companies and will keep them as one (but will still keep the new pricing thank you very much). All of this now means the progress of my Jetson movie watching will be delayed.

So what should we learn from this? That it’s high time we give the people what they want. I really don’t understand why these companies can’t get it together. It’s not hard to figure out. If you’re listening, here’s is what I want:

I want to sit down in front of my 50″ television, click on a menu button and watch ANY movie or TV show ever made when ever I want.

I’m talking anything not newly released. I don’t care how they do it. Get all the movie studios into one room and make it happen. There’s free money to be made. Get people interested in the old catalog again. Sure, there’s no market for releasing DVD’s from 1970’s game shows but if it was streamed as part of a package I bet there would be.

Chances are good that people who stumble upon a movie they haven’t seen in ten years will stream it on a whim rather than dig through a pile of old DVDs. There’s no time for that and we shouldn’t have to do that anymore anyway.

Stream absolutely EVERYTHING!  From the first episode of Mr. Rogers Neighborhood to Star Wars. I want it all, and I want it NOW. Charge me something like $34.99 a month (you’ve got to love the way making it a penny less than $35 psychologically makes it look cheaper) and I’ll be happy.

It’s coming. Sooner rather than later I hope because I’m tired of making my own toast, brushing my own teeth and standing in line at the RedBox.

I can just picture George Jetson turning over in his grave right about now.

 

 

Movies and TV, Music, NY Ink, Thought and Opinion

Get Me On NY Ink

I am a man on a mission and I need your help. I want to be a reality TV star. Let me first give you some background as to why:

A few weeks ago I posted an article on Technorati (and this blog as well) about my affinity for the TLC reality show NY Ink, a show dealing with the drama of opening a tattoo studio in the SOHO district of New York City. A tattoo virgin myself, I loved not only the drama and beautiful artwork but also the real stories people told on why they got their particular tattoo.

Much to my surprise the article was Tweeted and linked to by Ami James himself, the star of the show, and owner of the Wooster Street Social Club where the show is filmed.

A few days ago, NY Ink was picked up for a second season and Mr. James again graciously Tweeted the link to my article but this time also included it as an entry on his own personal blog:

Having been inspired not only from the attention to my article but also from the show itself, I decided to make it my mission to try to get cast on the show for season two.

In addition to the article (with over 500 Facebook “likes” and almost as many Re-Tweets), I’ve also had the opportunity to make contact with several of the show’s stars via Twitter.

One caveat of getting on the show is that you will have to pay for your tattoo as a regular client. There are no “perks” for being there other than being on television and getting to tell your story. You pay as any normal customer would.

I’m told that the cost may run as high as five times the price of a tattoo at a typical studio but I am willing to pay the price.

So, without any further adieu, here are the reasons why I believe I’m the ideal candidate to be cast next season:

#1. I’m a tattoo virgin whose had mostly negative opinions about tattoos until I watched this show.

#2. I do have a good story to tell about my rock & roll days and dreams coming true.

#3. I am a huge fan of Megan Massacre’s artwork. And she’s from Pennsylvania too so that should count for bonus points.

#4. I have my own group on Facebook with the sole purpose of getting me on NY Ink.

#5. Megan Massacre (The Artist) knows I exist:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#6. Jessica Gahring (The Shop Manager) likes my taste in poetry and quotes:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#7. Robear (The Floor Manager) has “Favorited” one of my Tweets:

 

 

 

 

 

Ok, so those last three aren’t really reasons but they’re still pretty darn cool none-the-less.

Let’s be honest here folks. I don’t have the pipes to be the next American Idol. And there’s no way I’d survive a day in the African Safari outback on Survivor (especially without bacon and Count Chocula). But getting my first tattoo and becoming a bad ass on national TV?.  Now that’s right up my alley and is SO rock and roll. Will it hurt? That I don’t know but I’m willing to risk it.

So what can you do? It’s easy. Join me on my quest for reality show immortality and help spread the word by signing up for the Facebook group “Get James Wood on New York Ink Next Season”

Who knows? Someday soon you just might see me getting needled by Megan Massacre! ~ And if so, I promise not to cry.

Books, Childhood Memories, Movies and TV, Thought and Opinion

Spider-Man

I can still remember it like it was yesterday. I was fourteen years old and my parents had just paid for my first subscription to The Amazing Spider-Man comic book. Having grown tired of my whining for sixty cents every month and my pestering of the local drug store for the latest issue they gave in to my demands and sent in a check for $7.20.  I could hardly wait for the first issue of my favorite super-hero to arrive in my mailbox.

I was a Spider-Man from way back you see. As far as I could remember. Well, I’m guessing that my ability to recall things started at age five so at the time probably about nine years if you want to really get technical about it.

Regardless, if there was anything Spider-Man related, I wanted in on it. I loved the idea of  how a guy everyone considered a dork (like me) could become this superhero with all the abilities of a spider. The red and blue tights concealing his identity only added to my excitement.

Want to know how much I love Spider-Man? Here are just some of the highlights:

  • I remember literally running home from school to watch the old Spidey cartoons from the 1960’s. Although I must admit, I thought the people who created it must have been high on mushrooms or something because some of the crazy psychedelic scenes were a bit over the top.
  • My brother and I shared a room growing up and he used to wake me up in the middle of the night. He’d say I was dreaming that I was  Spider-Man and literally trying to climb the walls. I still haven’t forgiven him for rousing me. I mean, bro, I was Spider-Man!!!
  • My neighbor friend and I actually made our own Spider-Man movies with an 8mm camera complete with costumes.
  • I was laughed to scorn when the live action Spider-Man series was on television in the mid 1970’s. You definitely take your lumps when you’re a Spidey fan.

Back to my original point: I was so excited to be getting my first Spidey subscription that I eagerly checked the mail every day. Days turned into weeks but I knew my heart my boy Spidey would never let me down. He’d arrive, just in time, like the theme song from his cartoon said. Sure enough, one day I opened the mailbox and there was a comic book completely surrounded by a brown paper bag style wrapper. Spidey was HERE in all of his red and blue glory!!

I hastily tore open the paper in anticipation of what lay inside, being extra careful not to tear any pages. I could just picture Spidey beating the crap out of Dr. Octopus or The Green Goblin. Maybe the cover would have a picture of Spidey’s girlfriend, Mary Jane Watson, dangling from a building along with some villain laughing menacingly as Spidey was just out of reach of grabbing her. I could hardly wait.

Anticipation and excitement vanished immediately and my jaw dropped when I saw the cover of issue #252 looked like this:

What the? Who is this? Someone must have screwed up at the comic book department. My parents checked the wrong title when they ordered. NEW Spiderman? What effing’ rumors are you talking about? I never got that memo. Apparently though, some alien costume had replaced the red and blue tights my homey always wore and I was NOT a happy camper.

With a quick look insider this comic I determined there was no red and blue costume at all. This was NOT my Spider-Man so out of frustration this issue quickly went into the garbage. On a side note: today that issue, which cost sixty cents back in 1984, is now worth $400.

Looking back though, I still have good memories of my days with Spider-Man and we still see each other when ever a new movie comes out (the next one being next summer).

Sadly, my dreams of being Spidey and climbing the walls don’t seem to be happening any more (thanks Bro). I do, however; still have my comic book collection tucked away with a lot of good back issues (one of them NOT being issue #252 thank you very much). I’ve even transferred the 8mm movies onto DVD so I can enjoy all of the adventures again. I’ll be selling them for $9.99 an episode for anyone interested.

It sadly took four years of this dark costumed imposter posing as my boy until the red and blue suit returned but the damage had been done. I had spent the better part of my teen years suffering in silence as my favorite hero played dress up. But it all worked out. I’m just glad my Spidey came back!

Spidey and Me