Art, NY Ink

New York Groove (Part 2): The Thing About Subways

The MTA system of New York City can be a bit daunting for the amateur subway commuter. It’s easy to find yourself lost somewhere in Gotham City if you happen to choose the wrong letter of the alphabet when boarding a train. Maybe it’s the small town boy in me but no matter how confident I am that I have chosen wisely I always find myself second guessing the decision I made the second the doors close.

I suppose that even the most seasoned of riders does a double-check every now and again just to make sure they’re heading in the right direction. For someone like me, a person who rarely visits the big city or rides a subway for that matter, it’s even more distressing. The thing is when you’re trying to make it to an appointment at the casting offices for Wooster Street Social Club (or anywhere else downtown for that matter) you definitely don’t want to wind up going uptown to Central Park. And this was no ordinary visit to the Big Apple to sight see either. My promptness was even more necessary because in this case producers and film crews were involved.

You see I was a man on a mission to get my first tattoo filmed for the second season of NY Ink and could hardly afford to be late for such a surreal and unique experience. So I took comfort in the fact that every street name I read on the subterranean wall at every stop matched the one I had on my pre-printed schedule.

Before too long the train came to a stop at the Canal Street station and I hurriedly departed. After quickly readjusting the backpack I was carrying over my shoulder I made the walk up the concrete staircase and into the bright morning sunshine on the Avenue of The Americas. The hustle and bustle of traffic and people mindlessly walking in step to get to their destinations reminded me that I was not in the small town of Easton, Pennsylvania anymore. This was the big time.

Me and Tommy Montoya

I pulled out my phone to check the time and was relieved to see that I still had an hour before I needed to be at the studio. It’s times like these, the in between arrival and actual appointment times, when nothing but coffee will suffice and I quickly spotted a Starbucks and made my way inside.

A contented smile came across my face as I sat down with my Venti bold. My biggest challenge upon arriving in NYC was to take the A-Train (or 8th Avenue Express) down to Canal and into the heart of SOHO with time to spare.

Mission accomplished.

Next: The Tattoo Pre-Production

A Conversation With, Interview, Movies and TV

A Conversation With Michael Berryman

When I was first introduced to Michael Berryman it was most likely the same way many other metal head purists from my era had first met him: by seeing his performance as the mean principal in the Mötley Crüe video for the song: “Smokin’ in The Boys Room”.

He was the ideal fit for the foreboding and intimidating figure that roamed the school halls and scared any would be malcontent. Someone you’d never want to meet in a dark alley let alone a principal’s office because a dog ran off with your homework.

Mr. Berryman has built quite an extensive resume of portraying these frightening and intimidating characters. From a mutant biker in “Weird Science” to even the devil himself in an episode of the 1980’s television show “Highway to Heaven“.

He’s been a part of the Star Trek franchise and is also a favorite of director Rob Zombie, having appeared in his films “The Devil’s Rejects” (2005) and the soon to be released “The Lords of Salem”.

But Michael is quite the opposite of the types of characters he portrays on-screen. In fact, it may surprise you to learn that he’s a strong advocate for the environment and leaving something behind for future generations to enjoy.

And here’s something else you might not know: the second film Michael was cast in just happened to be “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest”, the 1975 film starring Jack Nicholson that went on to win five Academy Awards including Best Picture.

But the role Michael is probably best known for is his portrayal of Pluto in the 1977 Wes Craven Film “The Hills Have Eyes”. Considered a cult favorite among horror enthusiasts the film has spawned two sequels (one in 1985 and the other in 1995) and two separate remakes (2006/2007). The original film also ranks #41 on Bravo’s list of 100 Scariest Movie Moments.

I had the pleasure of speaking with Michael and get his thoughts on the Hills as it turns 35. We also discuss the Mötley video, the importance of preserving the environment, his thoughts on working with film legend Jack Nicholson and his newest thriller,
“Below Zero“.

goJimmygo (gJg): Hi Michael, this is James Wood, how are you?

Michael Berryman (MB): Pretty good James!

gJg: It’s good to talk with you.

MB: You too!

gJg: Did you ever think that after 35 years people would still be talking about “The Hills Have Eyes“?

MB: Oh gosh, has it been that long? <laughs>

gJg: Isn’t that crazy?

MB: That really is. <laughs>

gJg: How did the role of Pluto come about for you?

MB: Well, I had just gotten home from my second gig which was Cuckoo’s Nest. We had worked 127 days on it and I had really learned a lot. So I came home to Santa Monica and actually had no idea what was going to happen next.

Then one day my agent called me and said he had a part for me to look at for a movie called “Blood Relations”. That was the name of the company but was also originally going to be the title. He said there was a producer named Peter Locke and some director named Wes Craven he wanted me to meet with. So he set up a meeting and I went and met everyone and was handed the script.

They told me it was going to be about a three-week shoot out in the desert north of Los Angeles. I told them that I was already familiar with the area. The temperatures there were always hot in the daytime and cool at night.

So a few days went by and they called my agent and offered me the role.

gJg: Any interesting stories from the set?

MB: I remember the day I went into wardrobe. I met a gal there who was also working on a degree in anthropology at UCLA. I guess you’d say she had some knowledge of the kinds of things a cannibal family might wear.

The necklace she gave me had some cool things on it: a pair of dentures, some bullets. My bracelet was actually comprised of real human teeth that she had gotten from a friend of hers who was a dentist.

We were going for realism and I guess they just figured I had the look for it. <laughs>. They discussed the premise and I said “Ok, let’s have some fun with it.”

gJg: Were there any accidents on the set? I look at the rocky terrain it was filmed on and I could just imagine people twisting their ankles on it.

MB: I was familiar with that area so that wasn’t really a problem. The worst part though was climbing those mountains. No one got hurt but it was very precarious.

One of the biggest issues though as far as people almost being hurt was probably the day we had the rattlesnake on the set. It wasn’t just your typical diamond back, it was a Desert Mojave Green and they are as deadly as a cobra. I mean really, really dangerous.

I remember we were all sitting in the ravine one day having lunch and I noticed that people were jumping out-of-the-way of something. I looked over and saw that the snake had some how gotten out of the cloth while the animal handler was getting something to eat.

Now here’s the scary part: one of the actresses actually picked it up and handed it back to him and he almost fainted. Wes and Peter were freaking out.

Fortunately, what the handler had done was taken some thin line and looped it through the jaw of the snake over the bone so it couldn’t get its jaws open far enough for fangs. But still…

gJg: Still scary!

MB: Yes it was. So he took care of that and then I asked him: “Why a Mojave Green?” and he said, “Well, its actually my pet.”

So I knew right then that he was a whack job. <laughs>

gJg: Do you see anyone from the movie anymore?

MB: Well, I actually have. I ran into Janus (Blythe who portrayed Ruby) a few years ago. Once in a blue moon I’ll run into some others.

I saw Peter Locke (producer) a few years ago in LA when they were getting ready for the first remake of The Hills Have Eyes (2006). Peter told me he’d see me in Morocco. The only problem with that was the director didn’t want me. So I’m not sure why they even bothered to call me in.

gJg: Anyone else?

MB:  I’ve run into Dee (Wallace, who portrayed Lynne Wood) at a few conventions over the years. Ken Horn (make-up artist) is the curator of the Hollywood Wax Museum. I bump into him every once in a while.

gJg: Now your character, Pluto, supposedly dies in the original film when the dog attacks him. Was that the way it was supposed to be or did they leave it open-ended for a sequel?

MB: No, originally we didn’t think there was going to be a sequel so I was pretty much dead. But in part two I explain how I managed to get patched up after the dog attack.

The one thing I really liked about Part 2 was the fact that we used a different type of film so it has a real vintage look to it.

About the only thing I wasn’t too thrilled about was the “Reaper” character. I just didn’t feel that he was a very complete character.

gJg: And then that damn dog got you again (the same dog that supposedly killed Pluto in the first Hills movie pushes him off a cliff in this one).

MB: <Laughs>… Yeah well, what can you do?

***

Michael on the Mötley Crüe Video:

gJg: What was the story behind the video for Smokin’ in the Boys Room?

MB: My first agent was still with me when I got the video. He called me up and he says, “Hey, there’s this band called Mutley…uh, Motley Crew and they want you for their video.” So I said, “Sure, I’ll go do it”.

So we went into this high school auditorium and all hung out in a make shift green room they had set up behind the curtain. They were all super nice guys, very down to Earth.

As we were sitting there making small talk we started bouncing around ideas on how to make my character silly. That’s when we came up with the idea for the wig, the bow tie and eventually, the ear wiggle.

gJg: Ah yes, the ear wiggle!

MB:  You know, there’s actually an interesting story with that. I told Mick (Mars, guitarist for Mötley Crüe) that I could independently wiggle my ears. Well once he and everyone else in the band saw me do it they loved it and wanted to use it. So the ear wiggle was put in at the very end of the video right after they snatch off my wig. It must have worked because the video was number one on MTV for quite a long time.

Well one day people started calling me up and telling me that they had noticed that the ear wiggle scene had been taken out of the video. Apparently, “someone” didn’t care for it and had an editor go into work one day and remove it.

But I guess over time enough people complained about it so they went back in and put my ear wiggle back into the end of the video..

So you know, it’s a cute rumor.

Years later I’m working on a voice over for Penny Dreadful, and low and behold the guy who was doing the editing for the film comes up to me and says, “Hey, a long time ago I used to work for MTV as an editor and one day I had to put your ear wiggle back into the Mötley Crüe video”.

<laughs>

So it’s a full circle kind of thing.

***

Michael on his newest thriller, “Below Zero”:

gJg: I see that you have a new movie out now, Below Zero.

MB: You betcha.. Below Zero.

gJg: What’s the premise of this film?

MB: It’s a thriller. Eddie Furlong plays a screenwriter who can’t meet a deadline. So he arranges to be shipped out into the middle of nowhere, locked inside of a freezer at a slaughterhouse. He’s got everything in there he needs to work. He just can’t come out until he has a finished script. And all during the process you don’t know if what you see is something he is writing or if it’s real.

I play the part of Gunnar who is the guy who runs the slaughter-house.

gJg: Oh, so Gunnar is a real character. He’s not part of his imagination. He’s real?

MB: Well, no he’s not….but then again….(pause)…maybe he is….. <laughs>

gJg: How did I know you were going to say that? <laughs>

MB: The movie leads in three directions and the cinematography is exquisite.


gJg: The trailer for it looks great!

MB: We’re all very proud of it. We filmed it two years ago in Canada. People can go check out the Facebook page or the official website to learn more about it. I know they’ve been playing the trailer most recently. It’s got a great musical score and is doing very well at festivals all over the world.

I’m saying that probably by summer it should be out for sale. I think its going to do really, really well.

gJg: Just from what I’ve seen of it so far I’d have to agree.

MB: It’s really, really good. I actually have a DVD copy of it and I’ll watch it every once in a while. The cool thing about it is that every time you watch it you enjoy it again, freshly. It’s not something you watch once and then put away. It doesn’t lose any impact over subsequent viewings. It’s really strong and I’m proud of it.

In fact, if you want to know the truth, I think it’s my best work yet.

And why?

Because it was my last work. And every time I work I do a little bit better.<laughs>

gJg: Yeah, that’s a good way to look at it.

MB: Well, you try. <laughs>.

***

Michael on giving back:

gJg: I noticed the tattoos they gave you for this role as well.

MB: Oh those aren’t fake, those are real.

gJg: Really? Wow, those are really colorful.

MB: Yes, they are. The one on my right arm is the sunset with the moon rising and mountains in the background. The one on my left arm is of a mother wolf and a pup. I actually lived at a wolf sanctuary for ten years.

gJg: Oh really?

MB: Wolf Mountain Sanctuary.in Lucerne Valley, CA. It’s run by my good friend Tonya Carloni. She rescues wolves and gives them a descent place to live. What she does is a very noble cause.

We also teach people about habitat preservation and the importance of preserving what we have before it turns into something like Joni Mitchell said: “Paradise turned into a parking lot.” We really need to leave something for our children to enjoy.

***

Michael on working with Jack Nicholson in “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest“:

gJg: Michael, I just can’t end our interview without asking you about what it was like working on Cuckoo’s Nest with Jack Nicholson.

MB: I get asked quite a bit about Jack and I tell everyone that I found him to be such a down to Earth regular guy.

He told me one day, “Michael, if I was as tall as you I’d be an NBA star right now.” (Michael is 6′ 2″). Jack was very athletic but just didn’t have the height for it.

He was just a real, honest, wonderful guy and a terrific talent and I was just tickled that he won an Oscar for it because he just threw himself into that role.

gJg: Well Michael it’s been so great talking with you. Is there anything else you’d like to say in closing?

MB: I just want to wish the very best to all of my fans. May you all have a peaceful, wonderful life and when you wake up tomorrow, make it a great day.

gJg: Couldn’t ask for anything more than that.

MB: That’s the plan I’m keeping.


Article first published as A Conversation With Michael Berryman on Technorati

Art, NY Ink

New York Groove (Part 1)

“Back in the New York Groove” was a song written by Russ Ballard that first appeared on the 1975 album “Keep Us Off The Streets” by the British glam band Hello. As a musician I know this because well, I looked it up.

Who would have thought that three years after it first appeared on vinyl that song would indirectly become part of my life?

It was 1978. The year the members of KISS, the biggest band in the world at the time and with enough glitz, makeup and pyrotechnic prowess to make even the great Liberace and his golden candelabra melt, all simultaneously released their own solo albums as a gimmick. “New York Groove” was a song covered by guitarist Ace Frehley on his solo album of the same name.

As a nine-year old boy, KISS was the world to me and Ace was always my favorite member of the band. Not just because he had the coolest face makeup but also for the way his sunburst Les Paul guitars would literally catch fire during his solos. Ace’s antics were one of the main reasons I picked up a guitar with the dream to “Shout it Out Loud” and “Rock and Roll All Nite”. As far as I was concerned Ace Frehley was synonymous with rock and roll and suffice to say, his solo album quickly wore out on my turn table.

So it’s kind of ironic how thirty-three years later that particular song, New York Groove, was selected to be the theme for NY Ink, the reality-based television series on TLC. For those who may not be aware, NY Ink follows the trials and tribulations of famed tattoo artist Ami James as he attempts to make a go of a tattoo studio in the SOHO district of New York City.

What’s even more surprising is the notion that the melody for “New York Groove” kept running through my head as I looked out the window of the bus that was carrying me to New York City to get my first tattoo from Megan Massacre, tell my own musical “story” and have the segment recorded for the second season of NY Ink.

In my family being of age and still a tattoo virgin is frowned upon. The inside joke being: “You can’t consider yourself a “Wood” if you don’t have at least a little ink”. Most of my relatives have been tattooed at some point or another but I never was. Quite frankly, I would have been perfectly content with being the only black sheep in the family.

It wasn’t until I stumbled upon NY Ink that I began to give being tattooed serious consideration. The artwork and stories I had heard really had a profound impact on me. More so than any “cool” factor would in me getting needled. And my own story would sure be one for the books.

From an early age I was a guitarist with a dream to be a rock star. You know, right up there in the same league as KISS, Survivor, and Bon Jovi. Yeah, that was going to be me.

I even remember writing  journal entries about “making it” while in high school. At one point I’d pretend my journal was a Rolling Stone magazine interview. I’d write questions that I’d want the interviewer to ask me and then answer them in full ‘rock and roll’ mode. I’d muse about who I’d be collaborating with, the up coming summer tour I was about to embark upon and what I did when throngs of female fans sought my attention. Little did I know at the time that one day the dream was going to come true but in a most unusual way. I couldn’t wait to tell the story and have it memorialized.

Me and Ami James

As the bus slowly rolled into the Port Authority Station a feeling of excitement and anticipation filled me. I slowly departed and made my way into Manhattan not really sure if I was more excited to tell the story, get my first tattoo from an artist I greatly admire or the fact that my experience was going to be filmed and possibly air on a television show.

In any case all I did know was that Ace would have been pleased. Today was going to be an interesting day.

Next: The Thing About Subways

Music, Thought and Opinion, Uncategorized

Musical Procrastination

It’s been a sad couple of weeks for music lovers in the Blues, R&B, Pop and Rock categories. We’ve lost people whose music influenced entire generations of fans.

Etta James, Whitney Houston, Davy Jones and just this morning Ronnie Montrose, all passed away long before we were ready for them to.

And while it saddens me that such great talent has moved on, some of us that remain have said things that have me scratching my head a bit.

One of the first things I always see lighting up the Facebook and Twitter feeds when our musical heroes die are posts from people who, perhaps unbeknownst, indirectly beg people to go out and buy their music posthumously. It’s as if when these musical greats leave those of us left behind feel compelled to give them one last big send off.

Maybe its a way to make ourselves feel better and somehow make these musical pioneers relevant again on the big stage. To show this generation of robotic, auto-tuned, vanilla music lovers what “real” music is all about. To say to them: “Do you see what you missed out on by being inside your bubble all this time? Natural talent that changed the game. And now it’s too late.”

But it’s not too late. Why must we wait until they are gone to try and get others to appreciate their contributions? We really need to stop putting off all of the great music that exists in this world. Let’s open our ears, maybe just a little?

Don’t you think Etta, Whitney, Davy, Ronnie or the thousands of other great artists would appreciate it more by seeing fans shouting from the rooftops while they’re still alive? The music never dies. It’s always been there. When are people going to get out of their box, test the musical waters and try new things?

Chances are, what they’re listening to now was influenced by the ones who’ve gone and they don’t even know it.

The choir that I’m a part of did a piece by John Rutter last year called “The Music’s Always There For You“. It’s a beautiful piece and one whose words seem to echo my thoughts. See if you agree:

But the magic you share when you make music
Won’t leave you when the time has come to part;
And it feels like you never have to say goodbye,
Because the music’s always there in your heart.

Album Reviews, Music

Omertà : Album Review

What happens when you take elements of Dream Theatre, Symphony-X and Disturbed, throw them all into a blender and then add the blazing guitar of a true genius of his instrument?

You get: Adrenaline Mob.

Consisting of drummer Mike Portnoy, vocalist Russell Allen, guitarist Mike Orlando and newcomer, bassist John Moyer, Adrenaline Mob continues to build upon the success that started last summer with the release of their self-titled EP.

Fans who may have missed out before will be pleased to discover that four of the songs from that record also appear on the band’s soon to be released full-length album, Omertà.

Produced by the Mob themselves and mixed by Jay Ruston, well-known for his work with Anthrax and Steel Panther, Omertà disproves the old adage that metal albums are made to just melt faces (although, let’s face it, there’s nothing wrong with that). The truth is though, it’s always been the songwriting and the sound that matters most and on both counts Omertà delivers the goods.

From the first few bars of the in your face intro of “Undaunted” I found myself once again asking the question: “How the hell do these guys sound so damn good?” It’s inhuman. They make it look so easy. And the best part of it all is: it’s actually THEM playing and singing. Not just another studio trick that record companies have been spoon-feeding the masses for years.

I mean lets face it, these guys are real musicians. Ones who have spent years honing their craft. Musicians similar to the greats I idolized growing up and ones who will now carry the torch on to the next generation of metal heads.

In addition to the songs from the original EP, here are a few more highlights from Omertà:

Indifferent is a song about self-reflection. One that is radio ready and a song that I can already picture blaring from my car speakers on hot summer nights.

I never thought you’d hear me say, “I’m better now, so I don’t need your sympathy.”

All On The Line nicely mixes things up with Russell Allen’s crisp vocals and an acoustic guitar intro delivering the message before kicking things back up.

I don’t wanna wake up and make the same mistakes.
It happens to me all the time.

For the metal head purists, the groove on Feelin’ Me is infectious and will keep your fists pumping for a long time.

One of the real gems on Omertà is the band’s version of the song Come Undone. That’s right, you read that correctly: a Duran Duran cover!  Something die-hard metal fans might consider “blasphemy” but in reality is actually just another example of how music has universal appeal. The song also features a guest vocal performance by Lzzy Hale of Halestorm – Genius!

Omertà is the next chapter in the story of Adrenaline Mob and coincidentally ends with the blazing song Freight Train, a cacophony of guitars and drums complete with real engine sounds.

Which makes me so glad I’m along for the ride.

Check it out!

Omertà Track Listing:

1. Undaunted
2. Psychosane
3. Indifferent
4. All On The Line
5. Hit the Wall
6. Feelin’ Me
7. Come Undone
8. Believe Me
9. Down To The Floor
10. Angel Sky
11. Freight Train

For more information on Adrenaline Mob check out: www.adrenalinemob.com

Movies and TV, NY Ink

The NY Ink Announcement

I’ve waited six long months to be able to tell you this story. No seriously, I’m not kidding its been that long. I’ve had a five-part blog that’s been in the works since last September and at last I’m finally able to reveal it.

I’ve got good news, bad news and great news! I’ll explain them all to you in that order:

Good News: Last summer, I submitted a request to be a candidate for Season 2 of  the TLC television show NY Ink and was actually chosen to have my segment filmed for the show!!  I got to travel to New York City, go on set for the show, tell my story and get my first tattoo done by none other than Megan Massacre.

After it was all over, I started to write a blog about my experience. And that blog got so large that it led to another blog. Which led to another. And another…. Before I knew it, I had written five parts.

Bad News: Season 2 episodes began airing in December of last year and my segment never made it to air. (Although they did show a glimpse of my session in a transition from one scene to the next). It’s too bad because I already had my IMDB application ready and several agents and publicists on stand-by. Sadly, I had to tell them the bad news. (Hope you all realize those last two sentences were a joke).

Anyway, through out the season I was already pretty much aware that my segment wasn’t going to make the final cut but I was contractually obligated not to say anything about my time on the show until the last episode aired.

Which was last night.

So…..

Great News: Starting Monday I will begin posting the blogs from my experiences on NY Ink. From the ride in to the city, to being on the set, getting tattooed by Megan and meeting most everyone from the show. You’ll also get to hear my “rock and roll” story and see the final work of art.

Although obviously a bit bummed that my segment didn’t air I have absolutely no regrets about it. It definitely wasn’t your typical tattoo experience.

If you’re already a fan of the show and are sad that its over here’s one last NY Ink story you didn’t hear.

One that I’m excited to finally be able to tell you about.

See  you then.

Movies and TV, Music, Thought and Opinion

A Farewell To Davy Jones

I never met Davy Jones. Never even saw him perform in concert for that matter. And yet somehow I still felt a sense of loss when word of his death reached me yesterday.

Quite frankly, before The Monkees I used to think that Davy Jones was just the guy who owned the locker everyone from Popeye to Captain Jack Sparrow talked about. Little did I know he could sing, dance and act with the best of them.

I still remember watching his antics on the show and longed to be like him. The guy with the good looks and boyish charm who could sing anything and woo any woman. Someone who was immortal to me. Until yesterday.

But rather than just post a blurb remembering the show, his records and just saying “goodbye” I’d rather write about Davy from a bit of a different angle. Specifically, from his role as himself on the Brady Bunch forty years ago.

When I first saw the episode with Davy and Marsha Brady it really struck a nerve. In the episode, Marsha had promised her friends that she would get Davy Jones to sing at her prom. She eventually tracks him down to the recording studio and actually manages to get inside and watch him record.

Girl. Look What You’ve Done To Me.
Me, And My Whole World.

As the producer begins scolding her Marsha makes her plea that Davy had promised her he would perform if ever he was in town. Davy, who over hears the conversation, later shows up at Marsha’s house and promises to perform at her prom. He even goes so far as asking her to be his date and gets a kiss for his efforts. And what boy wouldn’t want a kiss from Marsha Brady?

Although fictitious, the storyline of celebrities helping “normal” folks still resonates even today.

Just recently a young man who has been suffering from leukemia asked country music star Taylor Swift to be his date for the prom. Swift was unable to make the date so instead asked him to accompany her to the Academy of Country Music Awards.

We could sure use more people using their celebrity status for noble causes. The world would be a much better place.

I believe Davy Jones was much more than just a singer, a locker or a Monkee. In an odd sort of way I think he may also have been a trendsetter as well.

Godspeed Davy Jones.

Uncategorized

Lightning Bugs

It was early in the evening of June 5th. I’m going to have mark it on my calendar so I don’t forget. I had just spent the day working in the yard and doing everything possible to make it presentable for another week. The truth is, no matter how much you mow or how many weeds you pull you inevitably have seven days at most before the process will need to be repeated.

As I slowly pushed the lawn mower back into the garage residual grass clippings began to fall from the chassis but by that point I was too lazy to even think about sweeping them up. I was much too tired and they would have to wait til morning. And yet the smell of sweat and gas that permeated my senses gave me a great feeling of accomplishment.

I grabbed a beer out of the fridge and walked out on to the patio for some much-needed rest and to chill out as twilight settled in. I sat down at the table to enjoy the warm breeze and to admire my landscaping work. That’s when I saw them for the first time this year.

Lightning bugs.

I think the correct term for them is Photuris lucicrescens. Some others may use the word firefly in their vernacular. But we here in the Northeast portion of the country refer to them as lightning bugs. A bug that even the person with the most severe form of insectophobia will usually find attractive. Sure, the butterfly is beautiful and the lady bug is cool but as far as I’m concerned, nothing compares to the majesty of the lightning bug and I’ll be happy to tell you why.

There are certain things in life that remind you of different seasons of the year. We all know that when leaves begin to fall autumn is here. And when flowers begin to spring up from their deep sleep we know that spring has indeed sprung. But when we see the first lightning bug of the year it’s magical. It’s like welcoming home an old friend. One who’s been gone for months and now suddenly comes back with word that summer is finally here.

Long before I became experienced in the art of the lawn mow, my early summer evenings were spent catching these wonderful illuminating creatures. Nothing could compare to a day of swimming with friends in the pool and then seeing how many we could catch as the day drew to a close.

Running barefoot through dark back yards wearing shorts and a tank top without a single care in the world except for the task at hand was pure freedom. And there was always a feeling of wonder as you caught one of these little critters and then watched it slowly climb to the highest part of your finger, spread it’s wings and fly away.

Sometimes I’d capture them and put them in an old mayonnaise jar with holes poked in the lid. I’d fill the jar with long blades of grass to contain my treasures. I liked to think this was God’s intended way of making a lantern. Of course, it wouldn’t be long before the lights in the jar would go out as the lightning bugs would begin to succumb to the lack of air and I’d have to release them on my Mother’s demands.

The most fun of all though was during what I always called the “final hour”. This was usually around 9PM and right before my parents would call me in for the evening.

You’d still notice the firestorm of lights in the yard but now there was one that always seemed to burn bigger and brighter. It was the grand daddy of lightning bugs making an appearance.  At least, Grand Daddy is what I called him.

Grand Daddy was the baddest bug of all and of course, he was also the one that was almost impossible to catch. Every time you’d get close enough he’d fly just out of reach of your grasp. It was as if he knew the measurement of his assailant. I’m sure he was always thinking to himself: “Ok, this kid is four feet eight inches tall – I’ll hover six feet five inches off the ground”. But if you were lucky enough to capture a Grand Daddy when he let down his guard, you were always the winner of the evening’s festivities. It was childhood summer at it’s finest.

I think I had just finished my beer when the firestorm of lights began. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Grand Daddy flying nearby and I tried to make a pass to get him. Still smart as ever, he calculated the precise distance for my five feet eight inch frame and was just out of my reach.

I sat back down in my chair and smiled as I thought about how care free and fun those nights were and how my own daughter loves chasing the lightning bugs now.  I still try to never miss an opportunity to chase them with her.

I often wonder how there could possibly be any interest in watching television at night during this time of year.

Especially when there literally is so much entertainment right in our own backyards.

Thought and Opinion

In The Dead of Night

I was driving into work this morning around 5:30 am and was listening to a news update. Something I always do to fill the silence of my morning commute and also because I can’t listen to heavy music that early.

I know, shocker right? Nope, it’s either smooth jazz or news that early in the morning and most of the time I choose the latter.

I usually look forward to these drives. Not because I like being up this early and have to go to work but because the drive itself is therapeutic. I can find out everything that’s going on in the world and then drown all that sorrow into my morning coffee.

One of the top stories today was about the continuing increase in the cost of gasoline. In a feeble attempt to bring a bit of humor into the subject the news anchor said: “In case you haven’t noticed, gas prices rose two-cents overnight while you were sleeping.”

I didn’t find that line particularly funny. On the contrary, I think this is quite serious. Has anyone else noticed the pattern of things like this happening in the dead of night while we sleep?

If it’s not gas prices rising a few pennies shortly after the Sandman visits it’s legislation in Washington. Why is it that controversial bills and decisions that affect the American people always seem to be passed around three in the morning?

We really need to take some action now before this pandemic gets even more out of control. What if we put some high-powered sedatives into these decision makers drinks after 8pm? That should put them out for the night and allow me to get a decent night’s sleep and not have to sacrifice my morning Starbucks in favor of a half a gallon of gas.

There has to be some consideration for the sanctity of sleep.

Isn’t it bad enough they already screw me while I’m awake?

Sports, Thought and Opinion

Enough With The Jeremy Lin Sterotypes

Rant: ON:

I don’t know about you but I’ve sure had enough of these news stories about New York Knicks’ star Jeremy Lin being stereo typed.

Personally, I’m not a big follower of NBA basketball but it’s concerning to me that in this day and age we still have this racial nonsense going on.

In case you’ve been asleep under a rock, Jeremy Lin, a Harvard graduate whose parents are of Taiwanese descent, was a bench warmer for the Knicks but finally got the opportunity to play and became an instant sensation.

His success helped the Knicks win several games with tremendous efforts and last second wins. “Linsanity” became the word of the day in daily sports reports.

But one day, in the midst of a nice winning streak, Lin had an “off night” and the Knicks wound up losing their first game with him as a starter.

So what do you suppose the headline read on the ESPN website?:

“CHINK in the Armor”

You’ve got to be kidding me. You mean there was no one who proof read that article before it was posted, saw that title and didn’t raise a red flag?

The article was removed thirty minutes later after backlash and the person who posted the article was suspended.

But wait, it gets even better (or, worse in this case). Today I read a story that  Ben & Jerry’s, the ice cream company, decided to make a flavor to celebrate the success of Lin.

Ben & Jerry’s has named a frozen yogurt flavor “Lin-sanity” for the current NBA superstar Jeremy Lin. The frozen yogurt was originally intended to feature a honey swirl with fortune cookie bits in it.

After appearing briefly in the Boston area, the frozen yogurt was changed to include waffle bits instead of fortune cookies. Ben & Jerry’s has apologized for any potential offense that was taken for the use of the fortune cookies.

Fortune cookies? Nope, don’t see any stereotype there either.

Come on, we’re living in 2012. Shouldn’t we be past this lunacy by now?

Rant: OFF